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I'm Tee.......MT's Journal
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Date:2015-03-23 12:40
Subject:Lee Kuan Yew

Really saddened with the passing of Mr Lee Kuan Yew.....such men with such leadership skills are probably impossible to comeby again......and though for sometime now he had withdrawn himself from the public life and had by most accounts a very purposeful and fullfilling life I wish he had been healthy enough to see the 50 year celebration of Singapore...in some ways it would been a good symbolic event ,of his witnessing the culmination of all his life's hardwork.....

Somehow I cannot think of not comparing this to Sir Don not getting those four runs in his final innings....wonder if it is God, who cannot be just that little bit extra magnamious to let us have the happiness of achiving these symbolic miletstones....or is it us humans being so greedy that even after such a memorable and fullfilling life we still end-up being sad about some symbolic milestones not being met...:(

RIP Mr Lee Kuan Yew.

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Date:2014-10-06 23:26

When you family is away...you miss them,the house almost haunts you and all that but there is one silver lining....late in the evenings...the peace...the solitutde and Mohd Rafi.....aaahhhhh....

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Date:2013-08-17 12:13
Subject:Etc Etc...

The other day when I was going out for an hour or so the weather was quite good but then in Singapore it rains only when you expect it to and at other times when you least expect it to....and hence while coming back ,the rain like those kids who stand behind a door too "booh" you pounced on me...one of the things that happen when you are galloping in your thirties is that you start complaining/fussing about everything ...on how one should be more careful to remember to carry an umbrella ...need to have  a hot drink to avoid cold etc etc (guess there's a reason why they call it the mid-life crises) ....And so I reached home and it's only when I stepped in did I realize that I had completely forgotten to protect my phone.....I was dreading getting it out of my front pocket.....I was sure this was just a continuation of my phone jinx....but lo behold.....the phone was perfectly dry and was working like a charm...it is at this point did I realize that this miracle had been made possible only because of my paunch(a large one at that..)it had acted like a natural cover to my phone......and so now I have a valid reason for having a paunch....no more excuses like paunch is an index of prosperity ...or a scale of my wife's culinary skills...it's simply there to see me through a rainy day.....

On another note....for a very very long time and in-fact till today, eyes have a very prominent role in my notion of beauty....and so these days when many people especially my neighbors and all comment on my daughters eyes and say they are very beautiful....I wonder if it's GOD's way of smiling at me for having had those notions back in the days and to some extent even today :)

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Date:2013-02-04 23:34

After a long long time I happen to stumble here.....with no words or thoughts to put , I feel blank and am reminded of the lines which I guess sums up the state (of my blog)...
 naa baat puri huee thee ka raat toot gayi....
adhure khawab kee aadhi saaja maine jeete hain....

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Date:2012-05-11 19:26

How does one define a moment which forever changes your life......that moment which you have been visualizing for over 9 months..or maybe more......it's all so action filled, the doctor almost shouting... "girl you got to push harder","no you are not doing it correctly"..the mid-wife getting on a small table and helping your wife push...and all that while you are holding your wife by her head and whispering something which you don't remember because that moment when the baby emerges time freezes....you forget that your wife had been in labour pain for almost forever.....all that we wanted during that labour time was the baby to come out......in-fact I wondered to myself if it was all worth it...going through all that pain.....and yet when I started the conversation with my baby for the first time I forgot that frustration and all that I remembered was the journey me and my wife took over these 9+ months ...from the time she told me about her pregnancy to the final delivery......

Well to start where it kind of started...sometime last year my wife informed me that she was pregnant and like all guys brought up on standard Bollywood fare I reacted the way they show in movies but looking back I am sure that the news had not sunk in...it was only during our first visit to the doctor did I realize how unprepared I was....the doc showed us a scan and looking at all that black-n-white stuff on the screen I imagined a face and was thrilled thinking I was seeing my baby's face only to be told that a small flicker in that screen was my baby's heart..... and that flicker ended up controlling our heart beats each time we visited the doctor as it told us that the baby was doing ok...and as time passed the bump started growing....we started talking to the bump and trust me nothing can give you more happiness than your baby reacting to your voice.....it's like all your hopes for the future which is still taking shape in a womb were giving an affirmative answer to you...... 

In someways I think, that is the thrill of becoming a parent...you are creating something of yourself and throwing it into the future with the hope that someday the small bundle of joy will end up being a fine human being you can be proud of.....

While we teach our kids all about life.
Our kids teach us what life is all about.*

Here's hoping that this journey will be a beautiful for us.

*quotation was shared by a friend it's not mine :)

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Date:2012-01-29 15:57
Subject:Reality Check :)

This would be the umpteenth time when I will try to make a post and am not sure if this will actually see the light of the day so to speak....and I wonder why did something that I enjoyed so much has been forsaken so completely...I wonder if it has to do with what my friends say "you have changed" (which is completely new to what they used to say earlier (you have not changed at all))...I think truth like always is not absolute.....and so maybe the reason is somewhere in between....

Well today out of boredom I started checking my old mails...and when I say old I mean almost a decade old......mails written to friends....sharing my thoughts on all and sundry things...so if there was a mail about my getting a job ,then there was another one describing a chick I saw while commuting to office who had the most beautiful of eyes,then there were mails where I was discussing about expenses in bangalore.....and I wondered was I always this boring....I mean what was I thinking of myself all these years...damn.... I think one should preserve their old mails just to get a reality shock from time to time...to keep oneself grounded......also I noticed that in the early days of my mails I used to sign off with something like "with much luv" ...I am now trying hard to remember what was I having during those days....whatever it was it must have been some kind of drug...I mean "with much luv"???? dude seriously???.....and one thing lead to another and I started going through some old posts of mine......and now I want to go and hide somewhere......seriously some of the posts were just retarded...anyway after going through a few posts I caught myself smiling...that's when I thought if those old mails can make me think of old friends and if those posts can make me smile.....then maybe there is something right about them.....and so this post.....:) 

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Date:2011-07-11 10:07
Subject:India v/s China

Why I think India will be the most populous country in the world and why China will have higher educationally qualified people than India answer is here

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Date:2011-01-09 09:36
Mood: depressed

I was sure that I would not be posting anything related to the scams that are tumbling out in the Indian media.....but then.....

I think the general impression we tend to have is that law will catch up with the culprits sooner or later but I think the politicians know it very well that it is the Judicial process in India that is their biggest shield.....I mean they know it very well that once things come into the open and becomes a part of the judicial process it will take anywhere between 20 to 25 years for the process to reach completion....and after that one still has an option of re-appealing etc...the biggest proof of this is the case of Satyam founder Ramlingam Raju...here is a guy who gave a confession letter saying he had committed a crime and yet his sentencing has still not been done......on the other hand there was Bernie Madoff in the US who too confessed to his crime and not only is his sentencing been completed but he is also paying in other terms like him not being able attend his son burial which shows the social  ostracization Madoff has been subjected to compared to Raju who is still regarded as a hero who treaded the wrong path.......

In the telecom scam there has been a loot of the public resource but you still find the govt. on the one hand making a farce that it is investigating the issue by carrying out raids (after two years of the crime) and  on the other Mr. Sibal trying to defend the indefinsible by coming out with statements like govt should not treat telecom as a revenue generating source (so Mr Sibal should we give everything free to the private enterprise so that "aam adami" can get to use the resource cheaply.....while based on sheer volumes the companies make insane profits???) to the more recent statement that CAG report is errenous...then Mr Sibal why is your govt conducting raids etc? are you suggesting that raids were carried out based on media reports and court orders or more correctly  as Mr Sibal knows the truth that these raids  are an eyewash and don't count anyway???it's sad that a man who is being praised for trying to reform the education system and one credited with a very high intellect takes the "aam aadmi" to be a moron....but then truth is the political class gets away with so much loot that "aam adami" must be a moron to still have his faith in the system and go out to vote for these guys election after election.....

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Date:2010-12-11 18:28

Sometimes the way truth shows itself is amazing ......two sides of the same coin this and this .......how cynical can the Politicians and Congress in particular get.....I wonder what values are these guys brought up on.......wonder what their parents if they are alive think of these people....

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Date:2010-11-26 09:23
Mood: happy

Last weekend had been to see the movie Guzaarish (after marriage I guess one can only watch movies with Hitrik Roshan in them ....at least that's what seems to be happening in my case ) and even though the movie never gives a convincing reason why the protagonist wants to go for euthanasia , still the movie appeals......and I guess that because the way it's been made......it's almost like a poetry in motion....a painting on celluloid....and the way Hitrik has acted in it is simply outstanding......if for no other reason then one should watch this movie for his acting skills......and yes my favorite part...when the song "Tera Zikr" gets introduced....and the way that  song has been pictured.... it's almost surreal.......and the song itself....one of the simplest and beautiful song I have heard in a long long time.....

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Date:2010-11-20 16:17
Subject:Politics :)

It's been a while and I was not even sure if LJ still exists...apparently it does....Well two recent events had me thinking....and what better place to think out loud than LJ

The first is the election results in US....and what does it mean for democracy...I mean everyone knows that US is going through a very tough time and no matter who the leader is, he/she will need time to sort the economy out...under such circumstances if the President gets such a resounding vote of no-confidence that too within two years then what is he do? I mean in this day n age of instant gratification do we expect our leaders to fix humongous issue in an instant and if that instant solution does not come are we replace them with someone who promises an instant solution even though we all know that there is nothing like an instant solution......What this makes me believe is that democracy as is being practiced in US is good only as long as the going is good....when it comes to a crunch situation the voters do not think..instead they use the vote as a "anger expression tool" which really does not serve much purpose.....

The second event is much closer home and involves the 2G scam......this again I think is a result of the way democracy is being practiced in India....for starters you have the coalition compulsion which means that any party which sees itself as indispensable in the government  will indulge in corruption for the simple reason that it could be the only chance it gets to swindle such huge amount of funds....having said that it's a moot point to ask what was our PM doing while this loot was going on...well here again the peculiarity of the way in which this present dispensation works.....I will call it the distortion of democracy.....you have a party which gets votes because of the Gandhi family.......and yet that family decides to outsource governance to someone who has no political stake....this way you get to enjoy the power without any responsibility..and in case say the PM were to raise a banner of revolt he could easily be replaced....so I think the Gandhi family is equally responsible for this mess as much as the PM is.....and even though I know that our present PM's contribution to our country is huge he would do the nation a huge huge favor by showing some real leadership by coming forward to explain to the general public how and where it went wrong...

and to end..... do I think that corruption will end because of this exposure...I don't think so...but yes I think if we continue to have exposures like these then what may happen is corruption itself will become an expensive business to indulge in and that in turn may lead to it being reduced......

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Date:2010-05-10 21:59
Subject:Wise No more :)

hazaaro.n Khvaahishe.n aisii ki har Khvaaish pe dam nikale
bahut nikale mere armaa.N lekin phir bhii kam nikale

the irony of wishes is the more they come true the more wishes you start having....and so I am not sure what exactly my wish was when I wrote the below write-up...but to say that it did not work would be wrong just like saying that it worked completely would also be wrong...and so like life itself the below writeup  falls somewhere in that shade of Grey which leaves you undecided....I am posting it here for record purposes...

Lets make it short and simple I am tall, dark and (I will leave the handsome or very handsome part to your discretion.... ;) ).... What you get in me as a partner is someone who will make a sincere effort to be a good husband who will try to make you smile by cracking jokes (which you can be assured will be silly;) ) who will pull you to come for a walk or a drive on those breezy evenings(and most of the other time will come across as the laziest person you have known).... who will fuss a lot about keeping awake at night and yet will suddenly out of the blue insist that we spend the night under the gaze of stars.... who will tell you stories some real and lots of them made-up and above all will not tell you he loves you... if he does not mean it....... if interested lets just exchange mails and if both of us think we click then of course we can look at the future together

I am hoping to meet someone who has a pleasant personality is mature, independent ,well read, a good conversationalist and good looks always helps all in all someone who knows to have fun with a somewhat boring guy...:)

Well if your marriage portal write-up makes the transition from the marriage portal to your blog ,then it means that even you are making that transition  ...and just when I was getting ready to send the invites the below lines came to me and guess they say it all

they say Good Men Marry wise Men don't....
but the catch is that a wise man knows...
the right time to let the "wise man" in him go....
and so ...
soon I will be wise no more.....

PS:I got to stop listening to this song which was a personal anthem for a very long time :)

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Date:2010-04-19 22:50
Subject:IPL Circus
Mood: amused

Now that Tharoor is gone the real game starts...and it would be interesting to see how powerful is Sharad Pawar after all?If he can come through this without losing much (now that Lalit Modi's job is done I guess he can be made the fodder that the Congress needs) then it would mean that Sharad Pawar is the only person who can be a counter to some extent to the all powerful Mrs Gandhi......

Also it is interesting that the Income Tax Dept of our country got suspicious of BCCI/IPL  only after this controversy broke out......this can only mean two things one is that the Income Tax  dept wants us to believe that till this thing came into the open their intelligence division simply did not think it necessary to investigate  the financial dealings of IPL or the other being the Govt of India still thinks of using the IT Dept to settle political scores (a hark back to 70's and 80's)...and either way it is very disturbing......

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Date:2010-02-26 00:35
Mood: cheerful

I have often visualized myself sitting out on a summer night with my kids when they ask me "so papa do you remember how Lara played??" or "how was it witnessing experiencing a Sachin innings " and at that point I would break out into stories of these men...stories which I would have woven when watching them play.......like that innings Lara played against South Africa where each of his stroke was a statement against the history of that nation... and at the same time a balm for his own people........when his innings was not against another team but an entire nation which had wronged his people.....or a story about that hour of play in that Perth test when a young boy named Ishanth Sharma  made one of the best batsman of our times Ricky Ponting look like a bunny.....as if in that hour of play they both were enacting that old law of nature where youth challenges the established.....and through these stories I hope the kids will get to learn something about life .....and when I am deciding which of these stories to pick up... one story will be there right at the top....it will be titled "the boy who never grew up" and I will tell them how at an age when he had nothing else to prove to the world and after two decades of being at the top a boy went out to play as if he was representing his nation for the first time........how he batted for 50 overs to score 200 runs and then came back to field not because he had too but because he wanted to.......maybe he  wanted to tell his son that even his papa has to earn all that respect...and above all I hope I can tell the kids that even though their dad could never love anything as passionately as Sachin loved loves his cricked they should in their lifetime discover something which they can be so passionate about that it makes one transcend the physicality of things..... like age,pain etc....

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Date:2010-01-22 00:42
Mood: content

I have often used my blog to vent my frustration about various things...which I think comes across as me being critical or cynical about them...to be honest that frustration is more of a reaction to a certain event which leads me to form opinions....rather than me having done any research or me having made an attempt to study the event in detail....Well to say that this post is a corrective post would be wrong and at the same time I think this is one of those rare times when I want to be appreciative of certain things......

First I think we need to congratulate the Media for the work they have done in highlighting the Child molestation case by Rathore......of course there is sensationalism involved ...and it fits in perfectly with the popular image of a high and mighty getting away from a crime only for the law of the land to catch up with him...but in my opinion this sensationalism is what will make the others wary of trying to do something like that...for very few  if at all any (of the high and mighty) will be able to control the media once something like this comes out and so most people would rather forgo the crime than go on to take on the media(note this furore started after Rathore was convicted)....this article has very valid points ,but somehow I am of the opinion that simply having laws will not deter criminals......it's making parents,teachers etc sensitive about these things which in the long run would prove to be more useful....Also the way "The Hindu" is highlighting the monetizing of news is something really praise worthy....I think all newspapers owe it to the public to print a disclaimer at the bottom of the paid news...

Secondly I have often been very critical of former finance minister P.Chidambaram (even though by no measure do I qualify to be his critic) yet I think PC is proving to be a much better Home Minister than a finance minister......maybe his love for economics was blinding him from the real economy.....guess there is a reason why they say love is blind......

and to end with even though I am still not convinced about the motives of the Gandhi family yet I think you got to give it to Rahul Gandhi for being a straight talker...atleast of what I have read he does come across as someone who calls a spade a spade....which is a refreshing change to start with...

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Date:2010-01-07 23:26
Mood: contemplative

I think terrorism's root lies in lot of people accepting (rightly or wrongly )the idea that they have been wronged historically and when this idea ends up being a major part of one's identity then that guy thinks that any means is justified to correct that wrong.....and it is here that he gets an implicit  support of a society (for all his actions) which also believes that historical wrong has been done to it...and it does not help that the  media also identifies them with their religion(it's always "Islamic terrorist") which reinforces and in some ways justifies the terrorist's self perception...... ...of-course corrective actions are needed on all sides.....

Reason for the above.....well after a long time I came across a voice which according to me has some sanity in it........somehow after the Bush days not talking bravado and talking sense is interpreted as a sign of weakness.....hope there are more people with the kind of thinking that the author of this article has....

PS:I know terrorism is a much more complex phenomenon then the couple of lines mentioned above...the above according to me is just one of the component...

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Date:2009-12-28 00:49
Subject:Weekend,Movies,New Year...

Another long weekend comes to an end...and like the last few weekends it consisted of food made by friends....and movies.....

Talking of movies, PAA was a movie which leaves a sweet after taste once it gets over.... even though after having read the director's interview I feel the director went out of his way to justify Abhishek's role as a serious character and unfortunately he chose to portray that through the image of a "different" politician which for me was a distraction in the movie.....

Avtaar was a not just a movie but an experience in itself...the colors,the scenery and the whole 3D thing was something which reminded you of the magic called movie....the way it was meant before television invaded our lives....

3 idiots was a movie which has to be the pick of the lot not just because it has Amair Khan but also because it's one of those movies which reminds you of a not so distant past...the jokes in the movie are so real to campus life...like when they discover about "Human Nature"....and yes Kareena Kapoor certainly adds a lot of "likebility" to this movie....:)

and so that brings another long weekend to a close,which reminds me that in less that a week we will be stepping into a another year.....and I have this urge to wrap up this year.....like how one folds an old calender....a calender which has notes written on the dates..."need to pay bill" , "get the tickets done"...each note which at that time had significance, but now they are nothing more than some scribbles.....and so I try to mine out some memories with which I would remember this year and I keep bumping into the word commitment(there's only this much that you can avoid that word :( )...09 saw me making lots of commitment...commitment to cities , people and myself......to sum it up ,if 09 were to come in-front of me ,I would give it a tight hug and say goodbye..... 09 has been nice to me....but for now this one is for 2010...Happy New Year

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Date:2009-12-09 22:43

I can't believe that I am even trying it...there have been a few infrequent attempts in the past but after a few lines the feeling that "it's not coming" sets in and I give up...I am pretty sure that this will happen today also.....but today there is at least an attempt to not lose to my laziness....yes today I am not feeling lazy to fight my laziness......and I feel like someone who has just had a cast removed...you take the first few steps ever so slowly without rushing......it was as if I was suffering from mental constipation as far as blogging is concerned......but then , just like a constipated person has to be told that his fart stinks...I have friends(R & S) who in a polite way told me that an absence of post stinks.....and it hurt ...it really did...so here it is ,this post which is nothing more than a "laxative" to get rid of my mental ......(you know what)

It amuses me no end that a country that prides itself on it's open culture gets so fixated'ed by other people sex lives.....that Tiger Wood had so many affairs should not really shock people....I mean with the kind of money he has and the glamor that comes with being "Tiger Woods" it's not difficult to imagine that he had so many affairs but what amazes me is that with so many women in his life ,the man still kept his focus on the field and is still the number 1 sportsman in the world.....if ever I got an opportunity to meet him my only question to him would be "How did you do it????"....."focusing on the field that is".... :P

PS:I put that hurt part just to garner some sympathy....sympathy always helps after a long hiatus :D

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Date:2009-08-06 23:45
Subject:Confidence Booster
Mood: amused

Why I think there's a God after all....

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Date:2009-06-24 23:55
Mood: happy

If there is one word that I think my friends will not associate with me (and I am in complete agreement with them) then it has to be the word romantic...but after having read the book I must confess that if liking that book is akin to being romantic then I have a discovered a new aspect about myself even if that aspect was limited to the duration of my reading the book "Love in Time of Cholera" ....one of the best fictional novel that I have read...if you are into fiction you should give this book a try.....

----But he could not respond as he would have liked , because then his heart played one of those whorish tricks that only hearts can play:it revealed to him that he and this man , whom he had always considered a personal enemy , were victims of the same fate and shared the hazards of a common passion;they were two animals yoked together.

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